karma, eh?

i met with vince for coffee this morning.  it was really great.  i was super excited to see him for some reason.

over the past couple of days i caught myself preparing what i would say if/when he asked about dustin, since vince is now his boss.  then i caught myself and said, "dont make decisions, nicole, until it's time to make them."  i love this reminder.  i trusted myself, my guidance, and i knew i'd know what to say in the situation if something came up.

so one of the first things he says to me is, "i dont know if this would bring you pleasure at all, but apparently dustin went home yesterday to get his wallet and found a tree had fallen on his car."  i tried not to laugh.  and then i did, saying, "ohhh, that sucks!" 

we continued to chat, about work, how he's feeling about his new job and employees, my company, mental state, etc.  and what was great was that he talked about dustin a fair amount, and his potential, but also his lack of commitment.  he said he felt he was working through a personal transformation though, too, and he was interested to see how things panned out.  the whole conversation just had such a nice feel to it, and i can't quite put my finger on what was so comforting about it. i guess
it was great because i have had such intense emotions and thoughts about dustin, but vince doesn't really know that.  and he brought up points about him in conversation that weren't meant to encourage my heart and mind but did.  he talked about walking down the street with brad, the owner of the company, and how they run into all these people brad knows - business people, respectable people.  walking down the street with dustin, he said people come out of the woodwork that know dustin, but they're all the night crowd, partiers, restaurant people.  and i remember that happening with me as well.  and i was proud for a moment of the crowd of people i know and surround myself with versus the crowd dustin knows.  and just having someone sitting there with me, from a very businesslike perspective just making a note of this thing, sort of encouraged me.  like its okay and valid to want to be proud of the people you surround yourself with.  plus, i can tell this person, this man, respects the shit out of me.  he knows me, has seen a fair amount of the intimate details of my struggles with nutty g, and it was awesome feeling like he is going to go back to work, in the same small office and dustin, and he is a fan of me.  he's on my team.  supporting me, energetically, maybe even verbally, whatever.  it just felt good.

and when brent responded to my text about the tree falling on dustin's car saying, "karma is a beautiful thing," that felt good as well.  like it was nature's way of saying, keep on doing your thing, you keep on loving life, i'll stand up for you when people treat you like shit.

awesome. :)