rich, deep calm

to marsha,

ive missed you! so much to catch you up on. wanted to say hello and tell you i was thinking of you. and im doing GREAT.

just got back from transformational breathwork seminar with my mom in tahoe. in a nutshell, it was wonderful. hard of course but the lightness i feel makes it worth the work. actually walked up to ol' dusty boy yesterday at the market, which i have never done, and gave him an unsolicited hello/hug. there was a solid exchange of forgiveness, acceptance, and gratitude through the eyeballs in both directions. that was my perception anyway and what i was giving out. did a fair amount of work at the seminar around him and really finally feel in my heart that i cant be mad at him because he's not where i wish he would be. it's his journey to walk and he's got every right to be whereever he wants and needs to be. i've been saying that forever but all the breathwork finally "integrated" it i think so i actually feel that now.

feelin grounded, positive, peaceful, JOY. :)

had the thought of going to school here in charleston next fall (instead of say, seattle or chicago) to get my masters in counseling while STILL maintaining nutty g (now that it's easier to run). and until then i could continue to practice yoga and do some teacher trainings so that eventually i could have my own counseling practice and incorporate private yoga lessons as well. good idea huh?! makes me excited. soo i think my costa rica trip in february will now include 3 weeks of yoga teacher training.

also i feel i understand spirituality/god differently now. it is clear(er) to me how if god/source is perfect energy/creativity/beauty/love/abundance then it is indeed possible to manifest beauty/love/abundace/goodness in our lives now if we can try to get our emotions and thoughts vibrating on a clearer/more positive level so that source's energy can come through that emotional and mental filter without so much interruption. in other words, if source's energy is coming thru us to manifest a physical reality and it's coming thru a scrambled filter, it may manifest some not so pleasant physicalities and vice versa. someone drew a diagram and it just made sense to me :) anyway, i feel REALLY happy about that bc i've been confused about who im praying to and all that jazz for almost a year now.

so again, feeling grounded, positive, peaceful. and im really practicing accepting what IS in the very present moment and as immediately as possible. i dig it. and i think that breath/bodywork moved some old beliefs and patterns that were ready to go. finally! like not really believeing it was okay to be truly joyful and content without also being afraid of when that contentment was going to end...or what might happen in the future to throw me off.

i am okay. all life's good is coming to me. i may never find a mate, i may get married in 6 months. i may sell nutty goodness for a lot of money or i may keep it exactly the same size until im ready to give it away. who knows? but i wont be missing out on anything. life is one big hot tub of delicious, soothing, supporting water holding me up. i just get to cruise and enjoy. :)

i sound good huh? ha.

yeah so i wont be needing your services anymore. naaaaah just kidding!! neverrrr

okay thats my update. talk to you soon, you gem of a woman.

hugs

n